Pages 15 to 21

"In a previous life I was a beaver" Nick Daffern, 1/01/2006

Addressing the Philosophy Society christmas quiz:
"Empiricism. That is tangible things that can be studied. Science. Its about Measuring things. The average measurement is six inches*" Nat Westwood, 6/12/2005
*The challenge was to speak uninterupted for 1 minute without Hestitation, Repetition or Deviation. The listeners were in such huge hysterics that no more could be said.

Addressing Nat Westwood:
Concerning wooing women with words at one of many speed dates:
"Don't tell them any stories of times you vomited*" Nick Daffern, via text message, 11/12/2005
*at the time I had three stories, now its more like five.

On Daniel Bee:
"He is the type of person that if champagne could drink it would choose him" Nat Westwood, 1/01/2006

"Like Charles Kennedy I'm having more 'good' days than 'bad' days now, but the bar keepers aren't rushing to thank me" Nat Westwood, 9/01/2006

"Block Book the Black Book, because the black book is black and its back. Negro*" Dan Bee, via text message, 10/01/2006
*Is this Gibberish or Twisted Genius? Either way there are no tickets so you can't block book it.

"Chav-girls with hoop ear rings so big their feet don't touch the ground and they roll everywhere" Nick van der Leer, 10/01/2006

"They all look the same when you've got your balls on their chin*" Dan Bulmer, 24/01/2006
*Even I was shocked when I heard this one

"Why do people (parents) think you can only have sex at night?" Sophia Berrow, 26/01/2006

"Nat, this whole book is about you! You egomaniac" Sophia Berrow, 26/01/2006

Dan Bulmer's Dad: "I wanted to see what kind of drunk you are...maudlin? violent?..."
Dan Bulmer: "The kind that's too sick to swim back" 02/02/2006, 3/4 of a Mile out to sea.

Cantonese Waitress: "Sweet and Sour Chicken and egg fried rice?"
Ian O'Grady: "balls" 04/02/2006

"Not everyone kills themselves Darren" Lee Oliver, 9/02/2006

Concerning housing Nat:
"Don't mind you staying as you're just one and easy to accomodate. i.e. Southern Comfort, Chair, Blanket" Nick Daffern 14/02/2006

Nick Daffern: "In Italy there was a Bus to Labia"
Dan Bee: "How much did that cost" 18/02/2006

Concerning Nat being an Honourary Woman:
"No he's not! He's a man with a scarf on his head! Can't you see?!*" Richard Bainbridge. 18/02/2006
*Rich was really adamant

Nat Westwood: "If I give you some DNA then can you decode it for me and send it back by the end of the week?"
Richard Bainbridge: "Nat, the kids yours. Accept it" 18/02/2006

"I was 15. I had long flowing locks. I was the man*" Steve Willis, 24/02/2006
*All men have his nostalgia

"You know theres going to be a drought in the south? She won't have to worry about that when I've finished with her" Nick Daffern, 24/02/2006

"Its not if you win, its how you lose that matters" Steve Willis, 2/03/2006

Addressing Lucy Coogan, aged 15, who had consumed 4 beers for the first time, at a family occassion:
"Lucy are you ok? Are you Bulimic?" Ailsa John, 1996

Addressing Liz Logan:
"You don't have the last word. You have to have the last fucking paragraph*" Max Miller, 06/2006
*I should point out that this entry had the WORST handwriting of any. Evidence of just how drunk we were at the time